You can learn a lot about someone by observing what and how they create. In fact, I think it's really the most telling way to understand a person. They will censor their words, even their actions toward you, but when they create (or destroy), they are being their most honest self. You can't create that which you aren't.
Some people create a lot, frantically and recklessly. They are free spirits who approach life with their hearts open and aren't afraid to go at it over and over again. Maybe some of the things they work at don't work out, but that's okay. They're too busy moving on to the next thing. What they cook may not look beautiful, but it's usually edible. They mostly follow the recipe. Like Monet, who created a huge series of paintings of water lilies, working through each one quickly, getting it out there, and on to the next. These people also destroy recklessly, without thinking about the consequences. It's not that they don't care, but they just don't always realize.
Other people are more meticulous. They spend time poring over details. Even if they aren't perfectionists, they want to make sure that what they create is what they intended. Even if it doesn't go where they intended, it still needs to follow some sort of logical path to get there. Creating things is often a labor for them. Not that it is more exhausting, quick creation can be exhausting, but that it takes energy to focus on a concept for longer. If that makes sense. These people might create less in volume, but it doesn't mean that they are any less geniuses than reckless creators. Their hearts are more protected, not necessarily because they have been hurt, or they have can't express themselves, it's just often a part of their personality. When these people cook, they make the works of art you find in fine cafes, that look like art on the plate, the perfectly round cookies, they follow the recipe precisely, when it comes to things like creaming the butter and sugar, and making sure to mix the dry and wet ingredients in different bowls before putting them together. These people destroy purposefully, too.
There are all sorts of people in the spectrum, these are just the ends of it. Maybe I should get a Master's in Sociology...
Tuesday, May 12, 2009
This time of life is difficult. We have so many things to deal with, with school, and the beginnings of our careers, dating, and figuring out who we are.
I have been having trouble with one of my friends lately. I had the same trouble once before, once we started calling ourselves best friends, it became so much harder to be friends. When I was talking to someone today, he made a good point. At this point in our life, it's probably best not to have "best friends". It's good to have friends and people to depend on and care for, but having a "best friend" when you are supposed to be making all sorts of life decisions on your own, for your own progression can actually be counter productive. Just the psychology of the label itself can be detrimental.
Look at the TV show Friends. There are six of them, but none of them are any more "best friends" than the others. Some of them were at an earlier point in their lives, but now that they are in their twenties, they are just a group of friends. Their relationships with each other are different, but not any less valuable. That's how it should be. No one has to depend on one person for their emotional support, or feel drained by the needs of another person. Everything is spread out and diffused. Doesn't it sound wonderful?